New Year resolutions and power steps to achieve them


Yes, it’s that time of the year again when majority of the world is ‘listing’ their ‘New Year Resolutions’ by starting the headline as “WELCOME 2014 – New Year Resolutions“. 

Well, I am for sure one of them. I had planned Eleven resolutions for 2013 and was lucky enough to have achieved Seven of them in 2013.

New year resolutions 2014 happy new year Ananth V

New Year Resolutions 2014

So here I am, yet again with new ones this year. But I kept pondering over why I could not achieve the four from the eleven resolutions which got me into thinking and researching for articles online. 

I found some power steps and process that I feel could help each me may be achieve at least eight this year of the nice. Well, may be!

No, these are not my steps or strategies, but resourceful links and articles from Harvard Business Review that can be easily applied into each of our lives on a daily practice basis. So here they are – 

“The content given below are not in my words, but links and snippets of articles that I found really useful”

1. Nine Things Successful People Do Differently

  1. Get specific & think about the specific actions that need to be taken to reach your goal eg. Lose 5 Pounds and get to bed by 10 pm during weekdays.
  2. Seize the moment to act on your goals – eg. Make that call right now that you have been wanting to make. Finish reading that book or at least get started. Be precise – Start reading from 4 pm today, make the call in the next two hours etc.
  3. Know exactly how far you have left to go
  4. Be a realistic optimist
  5.  Focus on getting better, rather than being good
  6. Have grit
  7.  Build your willpower muscle
  8. Don’t tempt fate
  9.  Focus on what you will do, not what you won’t do

You can read the complete article in detail here: Click here

Heidi Grant Halvorson Management Harvard book

Heidi Grant Halvorson

You can also check out the Book at Harvard Book store – Click here by Heidi Grant Halvorson

You can check out many more such useful pointers and real value-adds here too  –HBR Achieve your goals in 2014 – http://blogs.hbr.org/2014/01/achieve-your-goals-in-2014-heres-research-that-can-help/

Do you have strategies or ideas for the same? Feel free to share them here with me.

What are your views and comments about having or keeping “New Year Resolutions”? Do share your views with me here.

Have a wonderful year ahead.

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Regards,

Ananth V

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Life and its journey towards happiness


Life and it’s journey towards happiness

ananth v life happiness

I recently read this line on a friend’s facebook positive share for the day:

 “Only a mousetrap provides FREE cheese. Happiness is a choice of life. Your very own choice.”

Very true. Everything that is worthwhile has to be always worked sincerely towards, for it, to be worthwhile. There are no free lunches in life.

 In other words, nothing in Life is free unless you buy the big size first.

Even for death to occur,you must have first Lived.

 What is Life?

I am no world leader and clearly no Spiritual guru to preach ‘what life is’ but I know for sure ‘what life is not’.

Life is not merely existing, but living, correcting, while making things right and going ahead rather than merely moving on.

The problem is majority of the times, we tend to replace things that are not working out for us rather than working on it to make it better.

 I remember my grandmother’s quote, she always used to say, “we were born in the world where if something is not right, we fix it rather than replace it with something new”.

 So, is Life the moments that go by each day till we merely exist physically in this world?

No, not really…. for a really worthwhile life, it would have been lived where we are remembered for something more than merely good or great, for something that we contributed to someone’s life where we could ‘touch their soul‘ positively.

So, love life and live it, never waste it on ego and pride. Too much of time is lost in this negative path and journey wherein time wasted such, is Life wasted…why? Because, time is what life is made up of after all. Isn’t it?

We search for happiness but the fact is, we really can never ‘have’ or ‘acquire’ happiness, even with the passage of time. Happiness requires us to put efforts in the journey to make things right. It requires us to learn each day and work towards making ourselves better human beings. It’s very easy to choose and make ‘logical’ rationale about people, life and happiness. The truly difficult part is to then live with it, especially if that part of your decision has influenced in any way the moments of your past that you have cherished for long and have dreamed of it resulting in creating your future.

Humility, passion, compassion and accepting that happiness is a daily effort which results from your very own actions and this truly is the core for journey towards happiness.

When we say, “I am not happy” always remember; it affects those around you and that too profoundly. There are so many people in your lives who have made or make efforts to make it worthwhile for you.

 ananth v life happiness journey

So, when you say to yourself or to others that there is no happiness in you life, its a smack on their faces where you unjustly accuse others who have contributed so much to your daily life, not may be in so many years, but in those precious moments where they sacrificed a ‘part of themselves’ may be at that point of time just to see a ‘smile on your face’.

When each day of your life starts getting built up with broken promises and unplanned harsh ‘logical’ and ‘rationale’ decisions, the very next day, the burden is always most difficult to cope up with. But they require not for you to move on to other things or better things, but rather amend the wrongs and go ahead with your lives and truly that’s when you feel more fulfilled.

 If every time we let our ‘thoughts of today’ and emotions of today rule our lives and the people around us, we are merely dwelling on the corrupt reality which are temporary in nature. So never let a moment’s decision or thought influence your lifetime of choices. Take time to make the decisions, but work towards making it right. Running away and avoiding that decision making process is what adds up to our worries, because every time we leave something halfway, we leave a part of our life emotions and experiences with it too. We loose a bit of ourselves in it. So, it’s best to work towards it to make it right. That’s a great and simple journey towards happiness.

 All of us are privy to secret griefs, either of ours or of others, or at times, both. The point is to embark on the journey with anything but a hostile levity. Understand the impact your decisions have on you and those around you.

Why? Because, life is truly made up of intimate revelations,which have been many times dealt by us with an unaffected scorn on the outside. But when we look deep within, these are really the moments that have probably given us short winded elation’s of sheer joy and happiness.

It’s not essential that for one to enjoy a vinous sleep to be possible only when intoxicated. You can do so without tightening yourself into an abrupt formality too wherein, you make peace with yourself and those around you. Why?

Those around you have made up the bits and pieces together and added up those moments which you call as Life lived. When you tear those pieces away, you are affecting your soul which clutches itself to some false hope with an indiscernible breathless intensity that has been redolent with hope and fear, withered and ravenously beaten with cheerful snobbery of fake joys and temporary allies, when they are left unfulfilled.

Life is too precious to merely give up on things and keep moving on in search of something better.

I strongly believe that ‘nothing in life is better, unless you put efforts and truly intend to make it better. It’s more about accepting who you are, working towards being a better you, for yourself and for those who have contributed so much in your lives. Sometimes we are, for too long a time, stuck with merely a single dream of a probable future in which we forget the wonderful realities that life throws at us, which when worked sincerely towards will for sure take us to help and build those dreams as part of our lives.

In other words, not everything for everyone ‘works out’ fine at the end of the day….but if it’s been a significant part of your life at any point of time at all, make sure you give it it’s due credit. Life is….. after all…connecting the dots of finding yourself in that journey. In that journey of happiness. It’s never too late….unless…you have given up!

So make peace, make things better, make it worthwhile…..and you will make your life filled with happiness. Have a blessed weekend ahead.

Would love to hear your views and take on the same too. Do share your thoughts and comments with me here.

Regards,

Ananth V

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Live for the little things that really matter


Live for the little things that really matter

Love Ananth

In this fast paced world we rarely find those moments, those precious moments of which we read about in novels or watch in movies. I am talking about those moments that really take our breath away.

 No, I am not talking about people getting married, having a baby or moving into their new homes. They are huge life changing events. I am talking about much smaller things and those simpler moments, those simple everyday moments wherein kids enjoy the sound of the birds, couples share a bus or train journey together, parents go to the movies with their kids. Its so rare these days. Or may be its just me…..I don’t know…..

 Today all I can see are kids running their little angel like fingers across their iPads or PS3 which have become idolatrous doting for them while they are sitting in their homes wherein the grandparents are busy watching their favourite soap operas on television that run stories of deceit, swindling characters, retribution plots in plenty and more such depressing concepts that would do nothing more than cause eternal perdition to the mind and finally the younger couples in the house who are most often found sitting separately in different rooms or much worse in the same room with one working his blackberry and the other working on some work related email on her laptop.

 I was traveling back from a meeting, reading a book and as I flipped through the pages on my tablet ebook, I just happened to notice a couple from afar. I was at the backseat of my car. As the vehicle moved at its snail pace safely dodging the city market traffic, I turned back from my seat and watched that couple holding hands, walking on the busy chaotic street while their other hands were busy holding an ice cream that was melting quicker than imaginable with the scorching heat.

 The car was almost in a static state in the crowded street of Goregaon in Mumbai and I like a little kid had my eyes still gazing upon the young couple who were so much in love. The only not so odd part about this was that I did not have my hands on the window of the car as I was watching them, now that would have been an epic movie like moment. A grown man, acting like a kid and more strangely staring at some couple on the street. But there was something about them that was both, very sweet and familiar.

 It was beautiful and it was just like the movies. It was 13:30 and the noon heat of Mumbai was doing no justice to the money they must have paid to enjoy that ice cream as it had almost melted completely. All I could do was hope for a kinder weather. Still, there they both were, trying to salvage whatever was left running from the sides of their hands and laughing and giggling in the middle of the street completely oblivious to the chaotic surrounding and the blistering heat. I saw them closely and it immediately struck me, they both were old colleagues of mine.

 The strange part was, they both were colleagues of mine from different companies where I had worked long ago. I asked the driver to take the car ahead and park it wherever he could find space and I got out of the car.

 Blast! The heat of the sun slammed my face as I got out of my vehicle. My eyes twitched with sheer angst from the heat and light. In that humorously semi-blinded comic state I dashed into a lady who was hurriedly walking looking somewhere behind her whilst shouting at a street hawker. She was carrying a huge purse under her arm, with a massive looking bag which looked like to me like she was carrying a years grocery (just exaggerating) in her hands, was screaming on top of her voice onto her mobile phone that was in her other hand and had a look that was seriously menaced. I suddenly felt a sense of compunction running inside of me for having dashed this massive looking lady who was walking the streets with no clue of anyone around and I immediately bent down to pick up few of the rolling potatoes and another vegetable which looked like capsicum and was trying to help her put them back into her bag.

 She seemed disinterested as she was still yelling on the phone. As I finished helping her out, she seemed to conveniently end her call and gave me an earful of heated scolding for not watching where I was going. I had half a mind to tell her that she was walking backwards whilst shouting at some road side vendor with a barbaric opulence and at the same time talking on her phone, but the heat had taken most of my energy in these two to three minutes. She had an abominable aura around her or may be it was the heat, pollution and the crowded noisy street, it was just too much. I thought it would be best to express regret and leave.

 So I apologized to her again and instantly got up and was looking for my old colleagues. I was blinded by the sun, slapped by the heat, scolded by the nice angry looking lady and the honking on the street was not doing me any good either. I somehow managed to locate them. As I sped towards them in rapid strides, I noticed they were still smiling, laughing and talking to each other in their ears and moving towards a shop that looked like it was selling wind chimes. Well, it was not a shop, it was a street shop selling wind chimes. Just before I approached them, I again looked around to see if I was the only one who seemed to be affected and annoyed with the crowd, noise and heat. But, thankfully every face that I saw around was equally cheesed off and irritated.

 This made me more curious and I looked back at this odd couple who were joyfully shopping in the middle of the street.

 I tapped both of them at the same time on their shoulders and they both turned in an orchestrated fashion. Their eyes lit up and both shouted at the same time, “Ananth!”

 Before I could respond I felt a jab on my back from the right and an elbow from the left on my ribs from two people who were walking with bags and in the same frustrated mood that I too was.

 My long lost friends then took me to the side, near the wind chime fellow, who was not very happy that I had interrupted his business and had distracted his prospects from making the purchase of the ghastly looking wind chime that he was holding in his hand. Before I could react to them, they both saw my face and the male friend, Rajeev said, “don’t worry re, I am not buying that. At least not that one for sure” I awkwardly smiled.

 Just then, it struck them, as Sheetal asked Rajeev, “How do You know Ananth?” and before he answered I said, “I know I have worked in different companies with both of you as my colleagues, I am just wondering how you two met?”

 I was really not wondering that at all. What I was thinking at that point of time was, ‘How the hell are these two standing here in the middle of the road and smiling and laughing’ while everyone around was looking so angry and irritated. I was doing it because I needed answers and wanted to know if there was a camera somewhere being shot of the couple as an advertisement, because it looked so made-up and movie like.

 beach ananth

But I thought I will keep that question for later.

 After another two to three minutes of their story about how they met and how one thing led to another and now finally it had been 5 years to their love marriage, they asked me what I was doing there.

 I told them I was returning back from a meeting and saw them both so thought of saying hello.

 “So are you both working here too?” I asked.

Sheetal said, “No. Jaanu works here, he is still” and before she completed Rajeev interrupted, “I am still working in the same company yaar”

“Oh Ok” I smiled.

 Sheetal immediately said looking at me, “My God Ananth, it must have been at least six to seven years since we met. You still look the same” and before I could take the compliment, that is assuming it was a compliment and that she had thought that I used to look good back then, I smiled and just before I spoke, Rajeev said, “Areey yaar, now because of you, I will be asked to do some dieting and watch my weight etc.Tu bhi na, meeting me after so many years and getting me into trouble.”

 I again tried to say something when Sheetal interrupted as she patted Rajeev’s paunch and then rubbed his glaring almost bald head with eyes that had a simpering piece of gentility in it, “No re, you look perfect”

I was relieved. I did not want to be responsible for an awesome dreamy couple getting into a fight or debate just because I looked the same way I did few years ago, which I am still not sure, of whether it was a compliment. I was so impressed by this couple (by the way, both of them are 3-4 years younger than me) that if they would have got into a childish argument, I would have made an attempt to propitiate with some old tale or fun tidbit to lighten the mood. But, they were so much in love, that nothing else mattered.

 Few minutes passed by and I got an official call and in another minute or two I found myself excusing and rushing towards my car looking for my tablet to check some email attachment while I nicely bid goodbye to both of them as I gave my card and contact all the while talking on the phone and gestured to them saying, “call me”. I rushed back to my car and got in and was back at my work.

 The fizz had gone in just those few moments, the dream sequence was shadowed by reality of my routine and I was back in the race of daily life as those cute moments slowly brushed off my memory.

 It was then refreshed when I got a call from both of them that night on my cell phone and it was doubly engraved into my memory when I found out that Sheetal was a housewife now who had taken her time out that day from her daily schedule to travel from their house in Mulund all the way to Goregaon to his office just to have lunch with him.

 I obviously asked the most ridiculous question apparently as Rajeev paused, thought for sometime and then answered it. I asked him “Why? Why did she travel, was there something special like an anniversary moment that I interrupted that day unknowingly or so?”

 Sensing my worry he immediately laughed and said, “not at all. She comes to my office once a month for lunch and most of the days she comes all the way from home in the evening to pick me up too.”

 In the semi-shock state that I was already after hearing that someone goes all the way just to pick her husband up from work and that too by traveling in Mumbai for two hours one way to reach that place, I asked, “How does she drive in this traffic in the evening?” and he said, “Drive. Arrey yarr, we don’t have a car. She comes in the bus from Mulund to meet me here. Then both of us take the AC bus back home together.”

 I paused for what seemed like a million years as Rajeev then broke the silence as he sensed what I was wondering. He said, “We live at my parents house. We are very close, all of us. Its just that she feels and I feel that too, by traveling an hour or two, we get two hours more with each other each day as we reach back home. She left her job a year ago and she has been coming to pick me up almost thrice a week since the last one year.”

 It was none of my business so I did not ask anything further. But it was just that I was so surprised to hear that. It has been five days since our conversation that night and I still keep thinking about it, “Why does she go traveling in Mumbai two hours just to come back with him?” I did not understand…. So I let it go, but then I called up my friend and asked him, if I can write about this to which he asked me, “Write about what?Abey likhega kya tu? I did not give you some rocking event or incident. I just told you that this is what we do. What will you write in this he asked?”

 I queried again and very sincerely told him, that if he does not want me to write about it, he can openly tell me and I will most obviously understand to which he again said, “Arey yaar, go ahead. Bindas write about it. I also want to read what are you going to write, in fact I always loved what you used to write back then when we were working together.When you used to write in your old personal blog. So go ahead and write about it, but please mail the link to me too.”

 So I did write about it and its four to five pages long.

 There is no story, it felt like the theme of Seinfeld for me when I was telling him I want to write as he told me, there is nothing in this. It will be a story about nothing and he smiled.

 Yes, it’s a story about nothing….for him and for her.

 But for me, it was something that I felt is missing in most of the peoples lives these days. Those precious moments of everyday. The little things that matter the most. Money, power, ego, dreams etc come and go. The only thing that we remember are ironically these little things, because they steal your breath away.

 I find couples taking these luxurious trips to resorts, retreats, cruise and at times the entire families going abroad across countries for two to three week as a vacation time of being together, but here they were. Two couples straight from the world of Cinemax, whose fun and awesome time was something that was there everyday. Just the two of them, together. Oblivious to the world around.

 If only such love and passion could engulf all of us each day, the world would be such a better place to live in.

 No expensive gifts, no cruise, no vacation retreats or long drives needed. Just two people who truly are in love and want to make the best of most of it, nothing beats this.

 It was simply beautiful and dream like.

 God bless those sweet couple for giving me something to write about for these fifteen minutes or so and something to think and remember about for a lifetime.

 Life truly is about the little things that make the most impact of all. Those joyous moments, those feelings of oneness and very simply put the desire to be with each other and a part of each other even in this world of numbers, made this story about ‘nothing’ so special.

 Do you live such lives or do you know of people who live such lives? Do share your comments and views with me if at all any on this, would love to hear from you.

 Regards

 Ananth V

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I had a brush with death today


I had a brush with death today

I was driving in the streets of Mumbai today morning. Following the rules of the road and laws of traffic and driving safely in the left hand side of the road when all of a sudden a three wheeler tempo came mounting up its front wheel and rammed my vehicle with a collision that smashed most part of the right hand side of my car.

Before I could realize what had happened the street was packed with traffic jam and the driver of the tempo was staring with a gaze as though not realizing what had happened. Neither did he move his vehicle nor was he getting out of it, but instead shouting at the now suddenly congested traffic to move aside so that he could drive by.

I was absolutely jammed in the car unable to move as the impact had shut the front right side door with brute force. All I could see from my driver’s seat was that the right hand side, headlights, the complete bonnet of my car was thoroughly damaged and there were glass pieces from my car on the surrounding area from the quick impact. After a long gap of about 5 minutes which seemed like ages to me, the driver from the tempo started his vehicle and started slowing backing it up. I could see there was no visible damage to his tempo.

I kept trying to move out of the car but that impact had pushed in the pieces of metal with sheer angst into the vehicles heart so fiercely, that there was hardly any place for me to move from the driver’s seat or even try to open the door.

The left hand side was impossible to move or get out from too. Somehow I managed to reach the backseat and from the only door that seemed to be opening, I got out and walked towards the tempo driver.

I asked him for his driving license. He showed no remorse and no regret for his actions and clearly told me that he does not have a license and that he has been driving for over four decades, apparently because of which he needed no license.

My vehicle was stationed in the same place at the left hand side of the road. He refused to come out of his vehicle. As the enormous mass gathered, I called for the police station immediately, got a few local stations numbers and began dialing them. Then I walked towards my car and got shook up as I saw the damage. It was painful to watch the damage done to my car by the driver of the tempo who was standing as though he was one of the onlookers from road.  He then started getting out of his tempo and I walked towards him asking for his license again.

It was only then that myself and everyone gathered around realized that this guy was completely under the influence of alcohol.

He had a timid and retiring disposition to his movements too as he swayed and started stuttering in a tone influenced by heavy alcohol. He was creating a racket towards me as he pointed towards everyone as though asking for their support by shouting, “Why are you driving on the left side, don’t you know you have to drive on right side?” I called up the police station and meanwhile he called up his contacts who in another 20 minutes or so quickly came and handed the guy what clearly looked like the drivers license and tempo papers. He was still refusing to come to the police station.

Meanwhile the cops had arrived and after a big discussion we all went to the police station nearby. The cops were very helpful and supportive. They spoke to me and they spoke to him and his heroic gestures and sarcastic remarks were proof enough coupled with his swaying walks and fetid breath that screamed of heavy alcohol all the while.

By the time the process of FIR was complete and I left with the necessary copies and papers, half the day had already passed. I had to call up for the tow truck to drive my car all the way to Ghatkopar for getting the damages fixed as the car was in no condition to be driven.

The tow truck came and it lugged my dear vehicle and as we drove towards the garage I could only feel the malevolence with which that guy had rammed my beautiful vehicle into such a horrid looking metal beast.

I can still feel the impact on my bones as I am typing this up. I can still clearly hear the glass pieces shattering and the metal crushing the other parts of the car. Onlookers were constantly wondering how someone could survive such an impact looking at the condition of the vehicle as they saw me scurry inside the vehicle just to make an attempt to crawl out of it.

This mishap and the waiting process till the cops had come had taken more than 30-40 minutes. Till then I stood there alone trying to stay near my car and keep a watch on that ghastly tempo driver so that he does not get away or drive away with his friends. As I waited for the cops to arrive, I could clearly see that the tempo drivers contacts had gathered around and were helping him with so many things with the tempo and his appearance.

There was a beauty salon nearby and there were two ladies out there who after seeing the incident like the scores of passersby and onlookers nearby, were at least kind enough as they approached towards me and in kind and subtle voice asked me if I needed anything, like water or a place to sit.

That’s when I realized, at that given moment; I was standing there alone till that point of time with no help and no sign of any other form of support for over 30 minutes after going through such wreckage.

It was the worst feeling anyone could have. It is feeling lonely and unwanted or uncared for when you already are in pain, both physical and mental. I said to myself, that the feeling of being unwanted or uncared or lonely is even worst than having no food or money.

Now this tempo driver, who had broken all the rules of the road in a single go, who was also completely drunk at 11am in the morning, standing there supported by his group of friends and I was out there standing alone. I found myself going through a stage of soliloquies as I stood there alone during that moment.

Somehow, after leaving the car in the garage, the journey back home in the auto rickshaw was much worse than the journey with the car as it was getting towed.

I don’t know now how much time all this process is going to take. But I got one thing right again for the millionth time in my life, “Life isn’t fair”

But that does not mean, I am not going to drive again or am scared that I felt death brush by me so closely today.

I am as human as you could be, yes. I feel pain and fear as much as the other guy, I too fall and land on my face at times.

But then I get up and I for sure don’t give up. Whether its people or routine life. I like to offer life a second chance because I know that deep down, someday the regret of not taking that second chance or not trying for something may be just that one more time might be more painful than anything else.

Life is too short to waste it on assumptions, ego or anger.

Today’s experience has taught me and made my anything but bitter. In fact, I have added so much energy into my mind and system after my brush with death today, that I am more than going to welcome decisions that I might have otherwise refused or said no to. Like I said, ‘Life is too short to waste it on assumptions, what ifs, ego or anger.’

I am not going say things like ‘I am thankful for another day’ no, that’s not my style, but yes, I will for sure from today make life worthwhile and positive for at least one person each day some way or the other.

After all, you only live twice!

Have a great day ahead.

Regards

Ananth V

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Life is all about second chances


There are literally a million experiences that we can have everyday of our lives, I know I do. Some teach lessons, some remind you that deep down inside you are human and still just a man.

Image

Many ideas, thoughts, innovative strategies, business decisions, emotional, social desires etc keep happening everyday and when all of them add up to your average everyday routine, there are only two ways of dealing with it. Either you keep fighting, enjoying the moments, trying to find solutions to concerns or you eventually crack down under pressure. It’s a human mind and there is only a certain level of pressure that it can take.

This again, differs from individual to individual. What one goes through on a daily basis and what he or she expects from life and all those around, is at times what tends to define how much they can take from those daily beatings that crop up midst the many smiles that one experiences too.

Some of the very important things that I have personally learned are that firstly, we cannot hold grudges about people and resentment about experiences. Simply because, the other person too has probably reacted a certain way because it was what they were going through at the moment, just like how we go through each emotion. Sometimes a small joyous decision or moment feels like a bliss of a lifetime and sometimes minor concerns and  issues that crop up in our lives tend to take their toll on our minds that breaks us down too.

Life is all about second chances, but chances, without the question of asking WHY it happened. Rather, go ahead with the belief that this experience too has taught us how to deal with a new kind of pressure. Thus building a stronger bond and relationship than ever before between the two.

Sometimes we do and say things that we don’t mean and most often than not, we sadly don’t say things we actually mean.

So lets start the morning today with an idea and a sincere attempt to give life a second chance. Most importantly, give ourselves a second chance. Not to question why, but rather welcome any decision or experience even if it was bitter, back from the past into our lives again with a mere smile and a fresh start. Like I said, no questions asked.

Just enjoy the moment!

Have a nice day.

Regards

Ananth V

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When nothing seems to work


When nothing seems to work

What to do when nothing seems to work for you……..

Ask yourself this question:

– Did you take a step forward to at least make an attempt to make it work when it was at it’s worse?

And never ask yourself: Whose mistake was it? Because, if you are going to choose sides before you try to make it work, you have already made a decision!

Yet, if nothing seems to work, take professional counseling, talk to your friends, family members, get engrossed in your routine, work, life, exercise, focus on your hobby…….

And if still……….nothing seems to work…………… Simply ENDURE!

Overcome – Overcoming Hardships / ENDURE

ENDURE Chinese Symbol

In Chinese, Japanese Kanji, and old Korean Hanja, this means “overcome” (as in overcome hardships, etc). It can also mean to conquer, to put up with, or to endure.

This can be a conquest over a problem, disease, handicap, poverty, or illness. Other definitions include overcoming, bringing under control, subjugation, or victory over something.

Img Src: orientaloutpost.com

God Bless & Be Well

Ananth V

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Ups & Downs of Life

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Simple questions, simple answers!


A friend of mine asked me this yesterday: “How am I supposed to keep working and growing in my career, impressing my boss, not overshadowing him and manage other aspects of my life like keeping in touch with friends beyond facebook, take time out for my family, be there for my fiancée, create  a secure future to pay my “EMI’s” and try to also add value as an individual  to society without getting stressed out?”

What I shared with him were not words of wisdom, mainly because, I am not a professional mentor.  I am just as human as he is. All I could do for the moment, was, just be an honest friend and shared with him simple, straightforward facts. He transformed, got energized and he loved it.  He then asked me to put it down on a note for him to share with his colleagues and peers. That’s how this blog post began.

 I told him, to begin with, you are already a step higher  as You have thought of ‘beyond your inner circle’, in the sense that, for adding value and reaching out to others too.

One needs to perceive ones own state of thoughts and say it out aloud. It helps in many ways. It also helps you define what you become, eventually. But most importantly, it helps you define the moment and why you are doing what you are doing and how you will transcend from it in life. It could be as an individual or as an organization or as a group.

 Simple things that have always worked for me is, I look out for this: “Whatever I do in terms of routine life or work, with the teams that I work with, with the people that I interact, I want a sense of ownership and freedom between each other with mutual respect.”

 Why?

 Sense of ownership is very essential as it lets you be “you” with no false pretenses and lets you express to the other with all honesty and trust. This will ensure in building good communication and healthy relationships, personally and professionally. Most importantly, long lasting relationships.

 Freedom ensures the fact that we respect our goals, values as individuals and at the same time, share that power of freedom for others way of life too.

 Mutual respect is the most essential part of any relationship, especially when it comes to friendships, family and business.

  • In business, you don’t build “clients”, I strongly believe that. You build relationships and friends. If you can’t connect with the client and share with them the belief and trust that you can make it happen for their organization, they will not connect back with you. Reason being, at the end of the day, people buy from people.
  • Similarly as a friend, if you expect people to be there for you, ask yourself, whenever I have made a commitment to a friend to be there, call back, help out, have I done it myself or am I expecting a self biased one-sided support.
  • As a client or a customer, if you treat either in a distrustful way, how can you expect the other to connect with all honesty. There are still people in this world, who do business for more than just fame and money. There are higher gratifications at work. Make sure you connect with the right groups then.

 These aspects gives you the gift of priorities and lets you understand that the life support system  doesn’t function merely on ‘numbers and targets’. It goes well beyond. As the old quote goes, “happiness” is the key to all success!

 So three words: Ownership, Freedom and Mutual Respect. Make it happen. Once you find yourself balancing work, life and your EMI’s you will rise beyond and get innovative to add value to others lives too. More to follow soon.

When in doubt about SELF, ask yourself , “To be where I am today, all the sacrifices I have made,were they worth it & if I had to do it all over again,how differently would I do it?” The answer not only empowers you as an individual but also lets you realize your transition over the period of time.

Meanwhile, feel free to share your views, comments and perception on this with me here. Would love to hear from you.

Regards

Ananth V

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Learning, more than just colouring from kids


Learning more than colouring from kids

park morning jog

During my early morning jog today, I experienced and learned  few amazingly simple and yet vital things.

Things that one can connect with in their day to day lives, either as a matter of events which happen  to you or to those around you. Things that you sometimes even spend teaching or imparting to your peers for hours at times or things that you see everywhere, at home at work etc. “working together and getting things done”

There were these two little kids, the boy was probably two or three and the girl, maybe seven or eight. They were playing in the park on their own. As I looked around them for their guardian or parents, I realized, I needed to look at the kids eyes instead. For every few minutes,  their eyes would follow around the park and land on their mother. The moment they saw her, a smile gleamed from their eyes and they would then go back to their mischievous routine.

Even the beautifully chirping birds seemed to stop once in a while to listen in on both the kids who were laughing and having a ball in the park, literally. As I watched these kids having fun, it was amazing how the eight year old was taking care of the little one and trying to finish her coloring book ‘pick of the day’, who happened to be Mr. Mickey Mouse himself.

Now the remarkable part here was, how both of them were getting things done from each other and at the same time having loads of enjoyment too. Every time the little one would start to jump over or take a piggy-back from his little sister, she would pick up the big red ball and toss it high up in the air. That surely saved few rounds of carrying her brother on her back. Soon the little one grasped what was going on and kicked the ball a few times far off, which made his sister, run behind and stop it. No more than three times had she run behind it, she realized it was easier to let him take the piggy-ride at least once. After which, the little one was soon then on his own for some time rolling on the soft grass laughing and gleaming with fun and joy as his sister got back to her colouring book.

Both the kids were coming up with new ways of persuading the other to do things their way and they were both coming up with really ingenious ideas to divert the other or at least wear out each other to get their job done.

The best part was, both were realizing it and still having heaps of action packed fun. For instance, when the girl was trying to color her cartoon-book with great difficulty as the little one kept trying to pull the papers off the sheets of the book, the girl would pile up the grass and throw it in the air which would leave her brother with enough thrill and excitement for the new found game, to spare her alone for about five to ten minutes. To then get back her attention, he started throwing the grass on her and give him some notice and play with.

The actions, responses, ideas both these children were coming up with, were simply fabulous. Finally she realized the only way she could finish coloring was if she let the roguish and naughty brother to be a part of it. So she started asking him to bring the colours from the crayon box. This was getting exciting as now he was part of ‘The colouring process” and he loved it. Soon they both finished colouring Mr. Mickey Mouse and the little girl gleamed with joy as her eyes twinkled and she yelled out with excitement to her mother as she showed her creative skills.

You could see the look on the little boys face when he soon realized, it was her book and he was not part of this celebration. As he tried to snatch the book from her, the ruckus and the fight that followed could be salvaged only by their mom, who came to the rescue and took them both out of the park back home. When the kids realized they were heading back home, they weren’t too happy either. But, they had no say, now did they. The only thing that looked cute now was the Mickey  mouse colouring page that was hanging from the mothers hand, out of the reach of the two children.

mickey mouse colouring book

I had finished about 15 rounds of the parks circle by then and begun my promenade when I thought about it, it was so simple and something that we all must have seen or even experienced in our routine lives.

  • Firstly, the fact that the kids were watching and keeping track of their mother throughout their playtime, tells us of a simple rule. To make sure things are working fine, never let loose focus of whom you are accountable for or to. It could be a person, an organization or even your own dreams and goals.
  • When there is a team involved, understand that, even though the goals and vision of achieving something might be same, the level of gratification is different for each person.
  • Whenever, we face difficulty in our lives (personal or professional) especially when it is due to a third-party interference which one cannot avoid, the only way out of it is if you have dealt with it by looking at it as an opportunity for mutual growth and creatively coming up with new ideas to deal with it. Involve others to be part of it only to the extent you can and you should and not any more. Let them also partake, learn and grow in the process with something that will make them feel important and also let them grow. Everyone needs attention and a pat in the back once in a while.
  • Once we realize something does not work, there is no point in bickering over it. Rather, acknowledge the lesson and improvise. You keep doing the same things; you will keep ending up with the same results.
  • If you have run out of ideas to get you out of difficulties, the best thing you can do is, make optimum use of the available time or resources you still do have access to, for the time-being to do your task.
  • When you are focused towards your goal, remember, you still can’t accomplish it, if you’re trying to accomplish everything all by yourself when there are external forces at work too which are beyond your control. It’s always more peaceful when there is a team or group involved who actually work ‘as a team’. It makes things more interactive, lively and fun for you and those around you. Respond back as giving feedback is important to the other person, as it is to you. Communicate, connect and take the journey towards the destination together.
  • Every time, you try not to deal with a particular issue, you end up thinking more about it. It’s better to find a solution to it and get it resolved. The only thing that can happen to suppressed issues are that, they will come back in full force when you are not ready to deal with it all. Rather, deploy your best creative skills to figure out the most mutually acceptable  solution to your common issues in working together.
  • The harder you work ‘with your peers and team’ quicker your work gets done and with more enjoyment. But do not over indulge yourself or your peers.
  • Never cease to constantly implement, analyze and improvise. When you pursue with focus, you will definitely get to your goals eventually. Never give up.
  • Finally, whenever you have taken someone’s help or are part of a team, make sure you share the bounties with them too. Or it never lasts for long. Eventually, someone else will be there in your place to pick your bounty and take your things away. Worst, that person might even end up looking like a savior to others. Just like you share your burden, your responsibilities with others, share the success and joy too with your peers. Fact is, either you take accountability for your life or someone else will.

Kids never cease to surprise me. They always have so many lessons to teach us. I guess its because its part of their new experiences and their fresh and non-judgemental way of looking at things. They are always ready to explore, try out new things and go ahead with full zest, energy and force.

Fact of the matter is, as kids, our ‘sense of urgency’ was always higher than when we grow up.

The best rule is to keep in mind, that the learning curve never ends.

Keep learning and stay fit!

Do share your comments with me on this. Would love to hear your views too!

Regards

Ananth V

Connect with me:

On  Twitter   On LinkedIn On FS

Disclaimer

The views expressed here are Only my Personal views and do not reflect any views or opinion of my Organization. This is purely a personal blog wherein all experiences and views are of my own.
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